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(accepting mission)

Mr. Torgue: QUEST TIME, HUMPADUMP! A DANGEROUS MONSTER whom you should kill is hiding out nearby. END OF QUEST BRIEFING!

(Arriving at lair)

DATVAULTHUNTR: Hey. Another Vault Hunter. You here to kill the monster, too?

HEADSHOTZ: Well buzz off! He only spaws like every ten minutes and we were here first!

E-SPORTS: 420 E-SPORTS LOLOLOL!

DATVAULTHUNTR: Get ready everybody -- it's spawning!

Torgue: What?! Now we'll have to wait FIVE MINUTES for it to respawn! THIS IS TRULY OUR DARKEST HOUR!

E-SPORTS: E-SPORTS 240 SPEEDRUNZ!

Torgue: IDEA! If you make those other players rage quit, you can just kill the monster yourself! If you kill one of 'em with melee, headshot another with a sniper rifle, and desecrate the last one's corpse, they'll definitely ragequit!

[incomplete]

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