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Space Slam/Transcript

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(Accept mission)

Tog: FAN-tastic! You don't need a ball -- just jump into the air and SLAM down on that hoop to complete the most slam-jammingest b-ball dunk in history! If you could do so while engulfed in flames that would be even MORE slam-jammingest!

Tog: And I only wanna see ONE b-ball player on the court at one time! The glory of this slamjam can't be split amongst the team!


(Jump while on fire)

Tog: HE OR SHE IS ON FIREEEE!


(Miss hoop)

  • Athena (if present): That was my practice shot.
  • Wilhelm (if present): Just warming up.
  • Nisha (if present): Airball!
  • Claptrap (if present): Darn, I missed the hoop!
  • Jack2 (if present): Jack meant to do that.
  • Aurelia (if present): That was purposeful. Just trying to make things interesting.


(Successfully slam)

  • Tog (to Athena): ATHENA HAS SLAMMED AND JAMMED THE HOOP!
  • Tog (to Wilhelm): WILHELM HAS SLAMMED AND JAMMED THE HOOP!
  • Tog (to Nisha): NISHA HAS SLAMMED AND JAMMED THE HOOP!
  • Tog (to Claptrap): CLAPTRAP HAS SLAMMED AND JAMMED THE HOOP!
  • Tog (to Jack2): THE SOULLESS BODY DOUBLE HAS SLAMMED AND JAMMED THE HOOP!
  • Tog (to Aurelia): THE VAULT HUNTER HAS SLAMMED AND JAMMED THE HOOP!

Tog: THE REPERCUSSIONS OF THIS MOMENT WILL BE FELT FOR EONS TO COME! Get back here for your post-game interview!

  • Tog (to Athena): Athena, that was simply the most b-ball-tastic thing I've ever seen. What's your secret?
  • Tog (to Wilhelm): Wilhelm, that was simply the most b-ball-tastic thing I've ever seen. What's your secret?
  • Tog (to Nisha): Nisha, that was simply the most b-ball-tastic thing I've ever seen. What's your secret?
  • Tog (to Claptrap): Claptrap, that was simply the most b-ball-tastic thing I've ever seen. What's your secret?
  • Tog (to Jack2): Not-Jack, hey, that was simply the most b-ball-tastic thing I've ever seen. What's your secret?
  • Tog (to Aurelia): Vault Hunter, that was simply the most b-ball-tastic thing I've ever seen. What's your secret?
  • Athena (if present): Just hard work, you know? Just practice and hard work. I was out there on the courts every day taking it to the hole and it finally paid off!
  • Wilhelm (if present): Well, it was a team effort. I gotta thank you, I gotta give it up to Dunks Watson, and you know I gotta give HUGE thanks to my deity the Almighty Robot Policeman -- all praise to the prime directives.
  • Nisha (if present): Gotta thank my coach. He told me I could do anyithing if I believed in myself, and it was a long road to get here, but we did it. We did it, Coach!
  • Claptrap (if present): What can I say? It's talent. Some people learn b-ball -- I was just born with it. I took it to the hole and I dominated.
  • Jack2 (if present): Ah, y'know, it's all for the love of the game, man, all the -- all the crowds -- I mean, that's why I do it, for -- for these guys. Y'know, all the money -- none of it matters, y'know, if you don't love the game. And, uh... the game's been good to me, y'know, you just gotta go out there, you just gotta give it 110%, y'know, and that's... that's why I do it.
  • Aurelia (if present): Well, it's a mental game, you know? You've gotta get your head in the right place, out-think your opponent, stick and move, take it to the hole -- it's all an art form, it really is.

Tog: Wise words from the single most ballingest athlete to ever hit the court. Speak to me again when you're ready.


(Turn in)

Tog: Back to you, voice in my head!

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